Are you one of those women who enter a relationship, notice that he’s not what he seemed to be initially, and then you start a hopeless battle to turn him into who you think he should be, in order for you to be happy together? Then, my friend, it’s time to wake up and value your time.
Behaviors can be changed; personality, values, and character can’t.
Some students ask me if it’s worth investing in men who are the complete opposite of them. My answer is very simple: If he’s the opposite of you in terms of lifestyle and tastes, there’s absolutely no problem. On the contrary, you have many things to learn from each other. Now, if he’s the opposite of you in terms of your VALUES, get out while you can, sweetheart.
Notice that, in the first example, we’re talking about behaviors, that is, habits or things he does daily, unlike the second one, in which we’re talking about his beliefs and the path his life is taking. For example, he might be a guy who doesn’t drink because his religion forbids it… If you like to socialize and have a few drinks with your friends, be prepared to have a more conservative guy beside you, considering that, aside from these religious values that determine his lifestyle, other parameters will also come into play, and he will possibly be a castrator in your life. Do you understand?
Another example: Let’s imagine that you’re very attached to your family, and you carry this value in your life. For you, family always comes first. Then, you start a relationship with a guy who doesn’t care much about family and who understands that it’s better to keep some distance from family, in order to avoid trouble. Think about how your relationship will be in the future, when you decide to have lunch with your parents on the weekends and he just doesn’t want to come.
Do you understand now, my friend, the difference between behaviors, beliefs, and values?
Don’t think that you’ll transform this man’s values, sweetheart. He won’t be different now, just because he’s with you. Understand, accept, and believe that people’s character doesn’t change. No one goes from one extreme to the other. People adjust to each other to improve their daily life; they can get better in some ways, change daily habits, like moving some hobby from Saturday to Thursday… But our essence doesn’t change. And, when it comes to cunning, vengeful, cheating, aggressive, and conservative people, for example, they might pretend to go through some radical changes.
People adapt to some situations when they decide to, but character is something that you build throughout your whole life and that defines your actions. If he’s never respected his old girlfriends, or his ex-wife, he won’t treat you differently. A bad boy doesn’t turn good, and a good boy doesn’t turn bad.
You might be powerful, beautiful, talented, competent, and intelligent, none of that gives you the power to turn a man into something that he’s not. So, try to be with men who match your ideals, mainly when it comes to values and beliefs, instead of fighting to teach men, because that will cost you a lot of time, effort, and energy, and it won’t lead you anywhere.
It’s one thing to be going through a phase in life, man or woman. Following a behavior pattern is something completely different. It’s OK, for example, for people who have been through a breakup to reserve some time of their life to try out the single life by meeting people, going to parties, and having fun in a free lifestyle. That’s often an unconscious attitude from a person trying to recover the time they “lost” after investing in a relationship that failed.
The point here is to know when it’s just a phase, and when it’s the person’s lifestyle, values, and character. So, do I mean that people can’t change?
No. What I’m telling you is that they don’t turn into much different people than they already were. And, to make it very clear to you, always remember these three points:
- BEHAVIORS – YES, it is possible to change and adapt them;
- BELIEFS – IT DEPENDS… Believing that “blondes are dumb” (which can be changed) is different from believing that “a man’s betrayal is different from a woman’s betrayal” (which is cultural, and will hardly change);
- VALUES – NO. Values don’t change, my friend, because they define a person’s path in life. When you question a value, you mess with the whole structure and the existential meaning of someone. Think of a young man, from a traditional family, who gets sent to war… There, naturally, he must kill people in order to come back alive. When he returns to his society, think of how this man’s head will be. Now, he might intimately think of himself as a “murderer”.
Do you see how delicate these situations are, and how you must have a surgical precision to account for these nuances? That’s why, in my course Magnetic Woman: 30 days to transform your life, I’ll teach you how to decipher the attitudes of a man, in order to know if he’s worth it. Don’t waste your time anymore, learn how to take opportunities and avoid pitfalls in relationships. SUBSCRIBE NOW to be part of a group of intelligent woman who decided to change several aspects of their lives once and for all.
And, if you don’t know me yet, my beautiful friend, my name is Vanessa de Oliveira, I’ve been studying the human behavior in relationships for years, and, as an authority in relationships, I want to teach my students how to know themselves so that they can evolve in several areas of their personal life, their social life, their professional life, their love life, and so on…
I’m sure that, when you learn the lessons I teach in my courses, you’ll come out as a truly powerful woman. They are the result of years and years of dedication, helping thousands of women, and the testimonials speak for themselves. Check it out:
TESTIMONIALS
These are just some of the thousands of testimonials I receive daily, my friend. And they don’t stop coming. I believe that, as an intelligent woman, if you got to here, you certainly are willing and want to go much further, don’t you?
We’re talking about behavioral structures, and, to reach this knowledge, my friend, all you have to do is follow my instructions and be open to learn more about yourself and about men. Everything is going to happen even without you noticing it… When you see it, you’re already there…
My friend… Besides learning about The Power of Unshakable Self-esteem that a woman can reach when she really decides to be powerful and confident, you’ll learn seduction techniques in ‘Be Seductive Above All Else’, a module that will show you how to use your power to captivate and reconquer men. By the end, my friend, you’ll be ready, and you’ll know everything about seduction techniques and how to make him take interest in and fall in love with you once again.
Now, my friend, the best part – which works better than any medicine – is in the module: How to Be a Goddess… In this module, you’ll learn how to be a well-resolved woman in bed, learning everything about sex and the importance of this powerful energy in your life!
You’ll learn how to become a Woman of Steel, capable of putting your love and sex life BACK ON TRACK, sweetheart. So, let’s go?
I’m waiting for you, my friend.
Much love to you
—
Vanessa de Oliveira.
